Plumbers have traditionally been the "butt" of many jokes. Here are few funnies that are sure to "crack" you up.

How many plumbers does it take to change a lighbulb? Two: One to get the beer and one to call the electrician.

How many plumbers does it take to change a lightbulb? Three: The contractor, the operative and the operative's assistant…who gets his electrician mate to do it on the side!

In what way is a plumber like a doctor? Both bury their mistakes.

"Did you hear that someone broke into our local police station and stole the toilet? Right now the cops have nothing to go on....."

A young plumber was called to a woman's apartment in New York to repair a leaking pipe. When he arrived he was pleased to discover that the woman was highly attractive and during the course of the afternoon the two became extremely friendly. About 5:30 p.m. the phone rang disturbing them. "That was my husband," she said, putting down the phone. "He's on his way home but is going back to the office around eight. Come back then, baby, and we can take up where we left off." The union plumber looked at the woman in disbelief. "What? On my own time?!"

A proud father was showing a fellow worker a picture of his five grown-up sons. His friend asked what they did for a living. The father said the older two are doctors and the youngest two are lawyers. The friend asked about the middle son and the father said, "Oh, he's a plumber. Someone had to pay for all the others' educations."

A plumber attended to a leaking tap at the house of a local brain surgeon. After a two-minute job the plumber demanded £100. Taken aback, the neurosurgeon exclaimed: "I've spent years at medical school and even I don't charge that much!". "Yeah I didn't either, when I was a surgeon. That's why I switched to plumbing!" replied the plumber with a smile.

A daily paper has received a communication from a plumber protesting against jokes about plumbers. It is to his credit that he remembered to post the letter. (From 'Punch' Magazine).

On a sunny bank holiday, a doctor is having some trouble with the kitchen sink. He calls his local plumber, only to be told that it's his day off. "But I get called out on my days off, too!" says the doctor, somewhat exasperated. The plumber relents and shows up at the doctor's house. He glances over the sink, looking preoccupied, and mumbles something about golf. He then hands the doctor a couple of aspirin and walks out, saying, "Put these in. If it doesn't clear up in 24 hours, call me tomorrow."

"Anyone who thinks a joke about a plumber is funny hasn't had a tap replaced recently" (Unknown)

Plumbers UK ©2015 | September 3, 2015, 4:59 am